Saturday, August 12, 2006

This Is Autumn's Doing

Speakerz Corner
Originally uploaded by lewishamdreamer.
It may or may not be actually. My mood always collapses along with the weather, which well and truly did collapse together. It's either the beginning of autumn or the first taster of it and it felt awful. It left me, I guess, feeling a need - not sexual, not desperate, more of an ache than anything else. And I really wanted to fill it through creativity. I really really want to push the boundaries of what I can do photographically with people but it's very hard. People have issues with their appearance, they have their own priorities, the list of obstacles feels truly endless sometimes. I ended up taking a self portrait which I felt pushed things a bit (and of which I am proud) but it wasn't what I'd wanted out of today. Maybe if tomorrow is sunny I won't keep feeling this - I wonder.

I want to make art that takes risks, challenges, impresses, catches 'the regulars' off guard. That's going to mean finding people on the whole who are prepared to meet me half way. Problem is all the people I know would I'd really rather steer clear from.

Photography has issue after issue built into it. I guess good photography would have to - you're asking people to give something of themselves. Why is it that the people who are managing to do this happen to have no soul? Do you have to be extremely patient or leave your soul in the cloakroom?

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